Empathetic Resolution Routine (ERR)

This innovative routine lets you see perspective and then use that to step out and resolve problems/issues creatively

One of the biggest crises of our times is the inability to see another's perspective, see the other as human, in fact. So, in our endeavour to teach empathy to children we used a modified ‘Step Inside’ thinking routine. We have also created a 'step out' tool such that it helps people step out of the others' shoes and use the perspective gained to creatively resolve emotionally charged situations.

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Overview

Information on this page is provided by the innovator and has not been evaluated by HundrED.

Updated March 2020

Web presence

2011

Established

150 2024

1

Countries

All students

Target group

Empathy is perhaps one of the greatest gifts we can give our children in today's world and perhaps, our greatest hope for a better future for humanity.

About the innovation

Sparkling Mindz

What we do?

At Sparkling Mindz our vision is "Inspiring Confident Learners". We want the children whose lives we touch to be learners for life, to be confident in their ability to learn and be agents of change who are both inspirational and constantly seeking inspiration from every moment of their life. We use a game-based methodology to deliver creative thinking, critical thinking and communication skills to children in the age range of 3-16 years. The games also extend towards empowering children with tools on empathy, ideation, inspiration-seeking and discovering values in the advanced stages.

Why we do it?

We believe that the world in which our children are living today already demands them to think differently, to solve problems, to collaborate, to be more self-aware and to learn to manage their emotions better. It implies that the children should be prepared with the necessary tools to think, be aware and communicate better. In order to achieve this, it is important that they develop a mindset of being creative changemakers who can take on the grave challenges the world is and will be presenting in front of them today and in the future.

Media

Update

Dealing with made-up stories and beliefs

One of the 5-year olds in our school had an interesting habit. She would make up stories of other children's parents dying, her father being hospitalized and many more such sad stories. When pressed for details, she would evade answering and she would cry when told that it was a made-up story so no one wanted to confront her either.In order to help the facilitator talk to her, we did an empathetic resolution routine with the facilitator. Before she could step in she had to acknowledge her feelings and beliefs.Feeling: Mildly annoyed at the incessant lying and helpless at not being able to show the child perspective of why it is not okay to make up storiesBelief: People who lie do so on purpose and saying things to them doesn't help (she realized that this was her belief with respect to adults that was coming into the child's space and was not resourceful when working with young children). Step In: She stepped into the child's shoes and saw the following:1. I see that everyone has interesting stories to tell and I don't. I also see that when I say certain kinds of stories others get shocked.2. I feel like I'm not good enough when I don't have stories to tell. I feel very powerful when I can make people react to my stories with disbelief and shock.3. I care about my stories being heard and having stories to tell everyone whenever I wantStep Out: She stepped out of the child's shoes and was able to see a different perspective which was unable to see from her limiting belief about lying. She then designed a few creative solutions based on the perspective she had taken.1. The child can be shown she can use her stories to create a variety of impact on others beyond shock and disbelief 2. The child can be shown the impact of a made-up story about another child's parents death or illness can have on that child through role-playing and she can be asked to empathize with the affected child to come up with a better solution3. She can be shown that her stories are not the only thing that people like about her. She is more than just the stories she makes up.4. Helping her understand that she doesn't have to constantly make-up stories to have conversations with others or get into friends circle, there are other ways to make it happen.5. She can be encouraged to make-up fantastical stories instead of those connected to real people around her (especially when taking creative liberty with characters)#2 in the list above worked beautifully well with the child. She realized the consequence of her action and then, agreed to #5 and #1 to make-up stories of a wider, fantastical range and not about real people.Giving teachers the tool empowers them to think creatively and empathetically to resolve situations that otherwise would have remained unresolved and hence, unaddressed as behavior or pattern for the child. Children deserve an environment where the adult role model empathy, creativity and resourcefulness when working with them. It promotes a sense of safety and freedom in children that is nourishes their mind, body and soul.

Photo

Is he disinterested, disconnected or...scared?

When I was introducing the Empathetic Resolution Routine to our students during Day 2 of orientation. One of them wondered, "Why is A not speaking much? It looks like he is sleepy and hiding in class." I invited him to use the ERR to work on the situation that he is seeing and he did.Step In: I'm A -I see: A new school, new faces, a new way of learningI feel: Scared, Apprehensive, LostI care about: Feeling comfortableStep Out: (Knowing what I know what would I do differently)1. He needs to feel like we are his friends, then he will get involved2. He might feel better if he knows a little more about how we learn and what we expect from him3. If we all share how we felt on Day 1 when we had come, it might help him feel more comfortable and ease into this way of learningThis felt Aha! to all the children who up until then were really disconnected with A and maybe judging him a little too on how he was being in the class.The kind of creative and empathetic resolutions the ERR tool helps children generate has never ceased to amaze me and I think it is a tool that keeps on giving, in every situation. It brings them closer to one another as a community and creates very strong bonds.Sreeja Iyer

Implementation steps

Gather Facts

1. If you are an involved party then share things from your perspective as well as what the other person said, did etc. clearly (without distortion)

2. If you are a teacher/parent, then ask questions to gather as many facts as you can for you to get a clear picture of the involved parties and the situation

3. If you are an involved party or not, express how you are feeling and acknowledge your emotional state. This is to ensure this does not carry into your next step.

4. Also clearly state any beliefs or values you have about the issue/situation/behaviour you are dealing with so that it is easier for you and others to acknowledge this and ensure it does not affect your next step.

Step In

Step In Routine Involves the following.

I'm the other now (assume that is X). So, I'm X (I step into the situation as X and answer the following prompts):

I see:

I feel:

I care about:

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You can ensure you are not projecting at this stage by asking yourself, "Would X say that about themselves?"

Step Out

You physically step into a different space and do this part of the routine.

Step Out: Knowing what I know because of my Step In what can I do differently?

Was the "I see" objective and wide in perspective? If not, how might we see/show objectivity and a wider perspective?

Was the "I feel" resourceful? If not, how might we bring/show awareness and help shift state to something more resourceful?

Was the "I care about" expressed resourcefully? If not, how might we encourage a more resourceful way to express the care about?

Iterate

Iterate:

At this stage, you check if the solutions you had found are working or not. If yes, you have just now resolved something with empathy and creativity. Time to celebrate!

If not, you iterate back to the leverages in the "step out" stage and see if you have exhausted all your options. If not, use them. If you have, then you iterate through the "step in" stage. Maybe you missed something there. A different see, feel or care about that given this new information of what didn't work can reveal itself and you find yourself with multiple solutions again to work with.

No two situations, the underlying intentions or the resolutions are the same. The only thing that really works is remaining creative, resourceful and empathetic.